Well

This blog goes dormant because I forget I have it.  I spend far too much time on Tumblr and Facebook.

In other news, OBAMA WON! 

I voted for him.  Obama may not be a perfect president, and I may not agree with everything he does, but I wasn't going to run the risk of Romney winning the election because I (and many others) may have voted for Jill Stein.  I'm content with the results, and I am looking forward to Romney going away.

Tammy Baldwin also beat Tommy Thompson in the Senate race!  And I cast a vote for her, as well! 

When she originally started running, I knew a lot of people (liberals, even) talking about how Thompson would win because Tammy was too liberal. 

Guess what?  She won!

Mark Pocan (who I also voted for) gained Tammy Baldwin's current seat.

Sadly, Paul Ryan defeated Rob Zerban in his election.  Though I live in Wisconsin, I'm not in Ryan's district so I couldn't vote in that one.

I don't know much else about Wisconsin's Congresspeople other than I believe all the incumbents were reelected. 

Our state senate is under the control of republicans again, sadly.  Basically, the state can do whatever the fuck it wants now without any real repercussions because they have a majority.  Hopefully they realize that they can't be as incredibly divisive or cruel as they have been in the past.

I'm pleased that Mourdock and Akin both lost. 

And I'm pleased that there are now 20 women in the senate.

I'm also incredibly happy that three states legalized same sex marriage and that Minnesota voted no for defining marriage as between a man and a woman.

AND Colorado and Washington legalized pot.

Oh.  And Puerto Rico voted to become a state.

So yup.

I know I didn't cover all the election results, but these are the ones I was really paying attention to in the past few months.

Alex happy :)

HEY LOOK IT'S SCHRODINGER'S BABY!

http://thenewcivilrightsmovement.com/pregnancy-begins-2-weeks-before-conception-now-the-law-in-arizona/politics/2012/04/13/37993

Honestly.  How much more stupid can republicans get?  Apparently this means that if I have sex in the next two weeks (no plans to, mother, don't worry), I am pregnant RIGHT NOW.

RIGHT NOW GUYS.  RIGHT NOW.

Oh snap.  Better stop drinking my liver into oblivion and smoking 3 packs of cigarettes a day.

And A WOMAN signed this shit into law.  Like, what the hell.  WHAT ARE YOU SMOKING AND WHERE CAN I GET SOME?!  That has to be some good ass shit, Jan Brewer, and well worth the side effects of massive paranoia and racism, of course.

I don't know, man.

This country is messed up.

I don't know what more there is to say.  This is so ridiculous in every way imaginable.

I feel like Oprah is just sitting there in the corner going, "YOU GET A HEADACHE AND YOU GET A HEADACHE AND YOU GET A HEADACHE!  EVERYBODY GETS A HEADACHE!"

Because that's what this whole ridiculous "life begins at conception or in the case of Arizona two weeks PRIOR to conception" is giving me.

I'm going to go watch Gilmore Girls now.

Peace out.

Victim Blaming and Rape Myth Acceptance

      Rape myth acceptance is the prevalence of misinformation about rape, women, and sexual assault in our society. This misinformation has lead to women second guessing their judgement and emotions. Victim blaming, also known as gaslighting, can make it difficult for women (and other victims) to perceive things correctly. Misinformation in our society has lead to a certain level of judgement of those who have been sexually assaulted. The prevalence of rape myths makes it even more difficult to differentiate between what is and is not true. Rape victims are often blamed because of rape myth acceptance, leading to low reporting of rape and lower emotional expression by women.

     Rape myth acceptance, or RMA, occurs when someone holds stereotypical beliefs about rape and sexual assault. This includes things such as thinking that because a woman is wearing a short skirt, she's “asking for it” or thinking it's okay to have sexual contact with someone has had too much to drink as long as he or she does not say no. Our society has a rather high RMA, causing confusion and misunderstanding among both men and women and justification for sexual assault when there should be none. In their essay “Stop Blaming the Victim: A Meta-Analysis on Rape Myths”, Suarez and Gadella explain “Burt operationalized and defined rape myths as false beliefs about rape, rape victims, and perpetrators. Lonsway and Fitzgerald further examined gender differences of the construct and indicated that rape myths allow men to justify rape and women to minimize personal vulnerability” (2011). Women downplaying their emotions often makes it difficult for both themselves and others to tell if there has in factbeen an incidence of sexual assault. Modern society, especially in the United States, seems to have a moral gray area when it comes to sexual assault. There is a distinct inability to perceive if something is sexual assault if it falls within that moral gray area, such as if you have sexual contact with someone who is intoxicated or under the influence of drugs. Society participates in the invalidation of a victim's emotions when it assumes that the victim did something to encourage the assault. The belief that because the victim didn't say no, his or her consent was given is an incredibly common misconception.

      Most people who have a high RMA think coercion is sometimes acceptable while those with a low RMA do not. Morry and Winkler point out that “Coercive behaviour against women is not generally acceptable. Low RMA participants indicated that coercion was never acceptable across common dating situations. Participants high in rape myth beliefs though indicated that at times coercion was acceptable” (190). Options of coercion can be anything from pressuring someone into having sexual contact to assuming because someone has not said no, they are consenting. In the stereotypical high school movie, there is usually at least one example of coercion. The boyfriend is with his girlfriend in the back seat, trying to convince her to have sex. She's hesitant and he says something along the lines of if you loved me, you'd do it. This is probably the most common form of coercion, a practice that most of us have been exposed to at some point. If not in real life, you may have been exposed to it by stories from friends or, again, the movies. Coercion blurs the lines between what is and is not consent, making it difficult for victims to deal with their conflicting emotions as they try to figure out what has happened.

      Rape myths often prevent women from reporting instances of sexual assault. Suarez and Gadalla explain that “An important factor that discourages rape victims from reporting is the non-supportive reactions that they often encounter after disclosing the assault. Research findings indicate that rape victims may experience postrape trauma as a result of those nonsupportive reactions” (2011). Again, this circles back around to the problem of blaming the victim. A woman walking home alone at night, a woman wearing a short skirt, or a woman dancing suggestively are all common reasons people give for a woman not protecting herself. There is a very large focus on how the victim's behaviors may have influenced the sexual assault, suggesting it was the victim's fault or the victim should have known better. Many sexual assault survivors suffer psychological problems because of the unwillingness of society to acknowledge that it wasn't their fault. This, often times, stops victims from reporting that they've been sexually assaulted because they know what has happened in the past to other victims of sexual assault. They are forced to choose between reporting it and being judged heavily or suffering in silence, being judged only by themselves.

      There is also a very strong link between acceptance of sexual assault and other types of violence. As Suarez and Gadella assert, “structural violence, therefore, facilitates the analysis of how societal tolerance justifies and legitimates rape as well as other expressions of oppression and violence towards women” (2014). Violence towards women on TV, in music, and even in society itself gives a certain justification to all actions of violence towards women. It's not so much that society approves of violence towards women but more that society is resigned to the fact that it exists and doesn't see that there can be anything done about it unless women change how they behave. This, again, leads to blaming the woman, and also causes the practice of “slut shaming”. This creates an either/or reaction in our society. If a woman has not had sex, she's often viewed as a tease, but if a woman expresses her sexuality in a way that is deemed “unacceptable” by society (often by engaging in premarital sexual activities), she's labeled a “slut” or a “whore”. This again creates confusion amongst women in the country about what they are or are not defined as by society.

      Gender provides a large difference in rape myth acceptance with men being more likely

to have a high RMA. “Gender showed the strongest relationship with RMA...with men

displaying significantly higher endorsement of RMA than women” claim Suarez and Gadella (2019). This is possibly explained by the ratio of personally knowing someone who has been a victim of sexual assault. Women tend to have more female friends, and females are more likely to be sexually assaulted than men. Because of this, they tend to be more informed about what is defined as sexual assault and how to avoid sexual assault as best as they can. Men, on the other hand, don't particularly have to worry about sexual assault (except in the cases of homosexual and trans* men). Men are lucky enough to live in a society that teaches “don't get raped” instead of “don't rape”, absolving them of a lot of the responsibility if a rape does happen. Society likes to believe that it blames the rapist, and it does to a point, but the victims take a large, undeserved piece of that blame.

      Rape myths lead to men viewing rape differently, changing their perceptions of what is and is not rape. As Morry and Winkler suggest, “...males should be more likely than females to perceive the victims as responsible and less likely to view the incident as rape” (189). This again brings us back to the moral gray area. The perception of what is and is not rape becomes much more difficult when jokes about rape and sexual assault are common. A commonly used phrase amongst many teenage boys, in particular, is “if she's not saying no, she's saying yes”. This blurs what is and is not consent, and causes a higher rate of sexual assault, especially date rape.

      Because of the prevalence of rape myths, our society has been labeled by some as a “rape culture”, showing that modern society accepts (or at least expects) rape on an unprecedented level. “North American society has been called a 'rape culture'. However, the anthropologist Peggy Sanday made clear that rape-free and rape-prone societies are achievable, and they can even coexist within a large societal context” (Suarez and Gadella 2028). Looking at music lyrics is one of the easiest ways to see why our society is a rape culture. Again, this doesn't always involve songs condoning rape but also songs that are “slut shaming”. A good example of “slut shaming” in popular culture is the song “Stupid Hoe” by Nicki Minaj. The entire song is about two women fighting over a man. A common theme in pop music, there is almost always a level of slut shaming, though not always as obvious as in this song. The chorus consists of only the words “you a stupid hoe, you a, you a stupid hoe”. Words like slut, whore, and hoe are all ways to drag women down by commenting on their sexual expression, suggesting that because they have had sexual relations, they are less worthy as individuals. This causes perceptions of women to change, making them seem like nothing more than trophies to own that someone has a right to. Slut shaming, in effect, leads to a wider acceptance of rape because it dehumanizes women.

      Television also contributes to a higher RMA. Kahlor and Eastin offer that “...the study supports the suggestion that general television consumption is related significantly to first- and second-order rape myth beliefs among adult men and women beyond the college student population” (225). The more television a person watches, the more likely that person is to have a higher RMA. We are constantly bombarded with images of violence on television, and there is almost always a layer of misogyny in the programming. Television, on a whole, influences our beliefs more than almost anything else.

      Clearly there is a problem in modern society with rape myth acceptance. The most effective solution in preventing sexual violence and rape myth acceptance is simply education. For example, a study was done with high school students and sexual assault and coercion awareness. Instead of teaching self defense, a common sexual assault prevention technique, the study focused on teaching how to recognize sexual assault and coercion. Over a number of days, the students were educated by different methods: videos, interactive exercises, seeing models of acceptable behavior, and even concrete definitions. This practice is highlighted in the article Evaluating a Prevention Program for Teenagers on Sexual Coercion: A Differential Effectiveness Approach by Pacifici, Stoolmiller, and Nelson:

      Benefits were apparent only for those students who, initially, were considered relatively more at risk.  Specifically, for all indicators of coercive sexual attitudes, students at or above the prescore mean benefited from the intervention, whereas those below did not. Moreover, although female adolescents were less tolerant of sexual coercion than male adolescents at baseline, outcomes were similar across gender (557).

      The success of the study was largely dependent on students' viewpoints before and after. Giving the information in several ways, not just one, provided a way for everyone to understand what the problem was and why it was a problem, making this an effective method in preventing sexual violence and rape myths. Because of the success of this and other studies, it would be a valid solution to adult rape myth acceptance. Though this study dealt specifically with teens, the methods would most likely work for most people regardless of age.

      Another method of education that is important in decreasing RMA and sexual assault is bystander education. Victims aren't just responsible for preventing sexual assault; the community is too. The problem with bystander involvement is, again, an issue with education. Education on what is and is not sexual assault and coercion will not just help stop people from being sexually assaulted, but it also will provide the framework for intervention. McMahon and Banyard report that “Some sexual violence prevention programs include the discussion of engaging in proactive opportunities” (10). By speaking up even just against sexist language or slut shaming, sexual assault can sometimes be prevented. If the potential aggressor realizes that his or her actions are not accepted by society, he or she may rethink his or her actions.

      The prevalence of rape myth acceptance, victim blaming, and slut shaming in our society creates problems for sexual assault victims. As women's emotions are downplayed, men continue to hold more power over them, making it difficult for women to rise up as equals. Until we as Americans accept that there is a large problem, sexual assault will continue to occur.  Certain songs and television shows that both treat women as commodities and constantly put women down also contribute to this problem. Education on what is and is not sexual assault and what is and is not a rape myth is imperative in reducing the prevalence of sexual assault and victim blaming in our society. Until we as a society address this issue, it will continue to be a large problem. By educating everyone, including our youth, on sexual assault, we can reduce the number of aggressors and increase the percentage of aggressors prosecuted for their actions.

REFERENCES

Kahlor, LeeAnn and Eastin, Matthew S. "Television's Role in the Culture of Violence towards     Women: A Study of Television Viewing and the Cultivation of Rape Myth Acceptance in the United States." Journal of Broadcasting and Electronic Media. 55. (2011): 215-31. Print.

McMahon, Sarah and Banyard, Victoria L. "When Can I help? A Conceptual Framework for the Prevention of Sexual Violence Through Bystander Intervention." Trauma Violence Abuse. 13.3 (2012): 3-14. Print.

Morry, Marian M. and Winkler, Erica. “Student Acceptance and Expectcation of Sexual Assault.” Canadian Journal of Behavioural Science. 33.3 (2001): 188-92. Print.

Pacifici, Caesar, Stoolmiller, Mike , and Nelson, Carol. "Evaluating a Prevention Program for Teenagers on Sexual Coercion: A Differential Effectiveness Approach." Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology. 69.3 (2001): 552-59. Print.

Suarez, Eliana and Gadalla, Tahany M. “Stop Blaming the Victim: A Meta-Analysis on Rape Myths.” Journal of Interpersonal Violence. 25.11 (2010): 2011-26. Print.

Not entirely political post, more economical.

During the summer, I clean hotel rooms.  I make $7.50 an hour doing so as a part time student employee.

The part time employees that are not students make $8.50 an hour.

The full time employees make $14 an hour and receive benefits.

While the part time employees, including students, have opportunities for raises, the full time employees don't.

The employees that are not students basically rely on this job for everything.  It pays their bills, their rent, and buys them food.

But guess what? $14 an hour doesn't cut it.  Most of them have at least one other job if not two.

There is a practice that is dying out that needs to start again.

People, tip when you stay in a hotel.

Even a dollar or two makes a difference.

If your room is particularly messy, you might want to leave a few extra dollars.  It's hard work.  We stand for 6+ hours a day.  We clean your rooms.  We make your beds.  We avoid moving, touching, or breaking your possessions.

I've been back here for a month.  I've worked about 100 hours since coming back, at least, and I've gotten about $6 in tips the entire time I've been here.

If you can afford to stay in a hotel, you can afford to leave two extra dollars for the housekeeping staff.

/endrant

/nowbacktoyourregularlyscheduledpoliticalblogging

/andbyregularlyscheduledimeanwhenirememberihavethisblog

This. Just...this.

Comparing abortion to the Holocaust just trivializes the Holocaust.

People assume my mom isn't a feminist because she's a stay at home mom.

FALSE.

My mom CHOSE to be a stay at home mom.  If she wanted to work (other than taking care of the house and my sisters, which, really, is the hardest job in the world), then she would.

If my dad tried to stand in the way of her going back to work, she wouldn’t listen to him and would do it anyway.

Just because you’re a stay at home mom doesn’t mean you’re not a feminist.

Part of feminism, a big part, is having the option and ability to make choices for yourself, not have society or your partner dictate the choices you make.

Kai Davis Youtube Video

"Sexual freedom isn’t acceptable for women due to the misogyny massaged into men’s brains. A queen loses her crown when she loses her virginity, and a queen becomes a bitch when she likes it."

Probably one of the most powerful videos I have ever seen on Youtube.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iAypP1xtxKQ

Question I got on my personal blog today.

Spring is here at last!

Sunday was the official start to shorts weather.  Monday I could have worn shorts, but it was raining and a little cold.  But today, I wore shorts.  In preparation for wearing shorts, of course, I shaved my legs.

And it got me thinking.

Why do I shave my legs?

I would like to say it has nothing to do with society.  I hate how hairy legs feel, so I shave mine almost every day in the summer unless I'm wearing pants.  I hate the cricket legs.

But it makes me wonder.  If society didn't expect women to remain "well groomed", would I be as grossed out by leg and body hair as I am today?

We all know the double standards society has on this topic.  While women are expected to shave almost all their body hair, men are allowed to let it grow freely without being too heavily judged.  Sure, they can "manscape", but it's not necessary for them to shave their legs before going out in public in a swim suit or shorts like society seems to think it is for women.

This is just a small example of the double standards in our society.  Makes you think.

Slut Shaming

Note: This entry is highly ciscentric just because I am focusing on my experiences and Sandra Fluke.  I also acknowledge that I, myself, have been guilty of slut shaming.  I am, however, now aware of this and am trying incredibly hard to stop using words like "slut" even jokingly.

Most people that have been paying attention to the news have heard about Rush Limbaugh's attacks on Sandra Fluke and women in general lately. If you haven't, here's a brief (and not detailed) explanation of what happened.

A few weeks ago, the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee called together a panel, inviting 11 panelists to come and speak about the requirement for all insurance companies to cover birth control. This wouldn't have been a problem, except out of the 11 panelists, none were women. This was a panel, essentially discussing women's health, without any women allowed to put input in.

Democratic representatives wanted to replace one of the men on the panel with Sandra Fluke. That request was denied because the committee chairman decided she didn't have the correct expertise because she lacked experience in knowledge of religious freedoms.

Fluke testified separately in front of the House Democratic Steering and Policy Committee. She argued in favor of mandating all insurance companies to cover birth control, citing a case from a friend who had a medical condition that required a birth control prescription. Because her friend's insurance plan did not cover birth control pills, she was forced to pay more than $100 out of pocket a month. Fluke argued that women should have the same coverage men do (for example, insurance often covers Viagra prescriptions.)

This is what Rush Limbaugh had to say about the matter.

"What does it say about the college coed Susan Fluke [sic], who goes before a congressional committee and essentially says that she must be paid to have sex? What does that make her? It makes her a slut, right? It makes her a prostitute. She wants to be paid to have sex."

Yes. Because Sandra Fluke wants equal coverage, that makes her a slut.

Slut. My god. I despise that word. It's disrespectful, overused, and offensive.

This is how things work in our society. A man has sex with 5 different woman in a year, he's just being a man. A woman does it, and she's a slut. It's SHAMEFUL for her to exercise her right to say yes to sex.

We live in a hypersexual society, but only for men. As a college student, I know several guys that have "scoreboards" they do with their friends to keep track of hookups.

A woman does that? People go, "Wow. What a whore."

A guy takes a naked picture of himself and it gets released, he can brush it off no sweat.

A woman does that? She will NEVER live that down.

Women are constantly forced to apologize for things they shouldn't have to. Women shouldn't have to apologize for embracing their sexuality any more than men should. Why is it that guys can buy condoms no sweat, but when women do they get stares from others? Why do we have to hide the fact that we are on birth control for any reason? There is NO SHAME in sex, just like there is NO SHAME in abstinence.

Do whatever you want with your body! Don't let people tell you what to do, and don't let them shame you into doing something that you don't want to. If you want to have sex, then have sex. If you don't want to have sex, then don't.

And just because a woman is on the pill doesn't mean she's having sex. I, for example, have had a prescription since I was 15 because otherwise my periods lasted for two weeks and were incredibly painful. Birth control is wonderful for controlling issues like painful periods, endometriosis, and polycystic ovary syndrome.

Now, because I hold these views, Rush Limbaugh would probably label me a "Feminazi". That's an awful word, too. Why does our society think feminists are crazy? And why do they think they're all extreme. Just because you're a feminist doesn't mean you can't shower, wear makeup, and shave.

Take my mom, for example. My mom doesn't work. She's a stay at home mom. But she's a stay at home mom because she CHOOSES to be. My dad doesn't tell her to stay home, and she doesn't "know her place". My mom's place, along with any other woman's, is wherever she damn well pleases. If my mom wanted to become a policewoman, a firefighter, or a pilot, she damn well could, and she damn well would.

Feminism is the advocacy of women's rights on the grounds of political, social, and economic equality to men. It's a fight against misogyny and a fight for equality.

Feminism is not anti-men or misandrous. I hate that when I say I'm a feminist, people say, "Oh, so do you hate men then?"

NO. Being a feminist doesn't make me a bra burning, no shaving lesbian (though there's nothing wrong with being like that). You know what being a feminist makes me? Someone who wants EQUALITY.

That's why feminists hate words like "slut" so much. It heightens the gap between men and women. Women are chastised while men are praised, and it needs to stop now.

Valid reasons to get an abortion:

Because you want one.

That's the only reason you need.

End of story.

I just got called a libtard on a YouTube post.

Now, it doesn't bother me when someone calls me that.  I just brush them off.

But, nonetheless, it is an inappropriate term to use.

I, myself, have been guilty of using the phrase teatard on occasion, and I have made a decision to stop using it.

It's unfair and it's small minded to use phrases like that.

I think we all have forgotten what civil discourse is.

There are ways to get across your point without constantly insulting the other party.

I do have a problem with sticking to civil discourse sometimes, I will admit.  But I try to.

As should everyone else.

As long as you respect my views, I will respect yours.

We need to reinstate RESPECT in this country.  We've strayed from respect and compromise and have retreated to name calling and finger pointing.

If we want to get anything done, we need to work together to find a solution, not do things like passing resolutions naming days for football players.

I'm referring, of course, to the Wisconsin Congress's latest decision to name 12/12/12 as Aaron Rodgers Day.

Now, don't get me wrong.  I love Aaron Rodgers, and I love the Packers.

But there are more important things to get done than naming days for football players.

It's sad that that's the only thing we can find to agree upon.

Abortion.

You know, that's a loaded word.  And a lot of people avoid discussing it just because of how loaded an issue it is.

I have friends that are pro-life.  I have friends that are pro-choice.

I've heard every argument possible.

I, myself, am pro-choice.

And I shouldn't have to constantly defend my opinion, nor should I be called a "baby killer" when I offer my opinion.

I am not pro-ABORTION.

I am pro-CHOICE.

I don't walk around punching pregnant women in the stomach, and I don't tell every pregnant woman I meet, "You should abort your child."

It is not my place to tell people what they should and should not do with their bodies.

And it's not yours, either.